The Brits sure do love their tabloids

British Tabloids in Tescos-1


I was overwhelmed at the number of tabloids aka “celebrity” magazines in Tescos. Yet not one single copy of Wired could be found on their shelves. Lame. I also noticed the number of young girls on buses and trains reading this pappo-trash (I just made up this word. I think it’s kinda neat.) Anyway, I have a strong policy against reading pappo-trash. The day Britters shaved her head, I said good bye to pink, tmz, intouch, instyle, rag o’ the month. I just thought who am I to judge? And gadgets > lame fashion tips. Plus, what fashion tip do I need? How to stay warm and snug in your pajamas in your bed? or Sexy Slippers for work and play? (Assuming you could wear slippers outside. Might be inappropriate. I guess I should stop doing it.)

So why do Brits love their tabloids so much? And can any one explain the photo below? Is it possible that there is a link between fat balls and tabloids? If so, I’m anxious for your reply.


Fat Balls 8 for a pound

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  • Reply
    February 19, 2008 at 6:18 PM

    I can’t help but be reminded of this classic SNL clip:

  • Reply
    February 19, 2008 at 9:51 PM

    aren’t fat balls bird food?

    what’s next, “deez nuts” for squirrels?

  • Reply
    Chris Magnusson
    February 19, 2008 at 11:29 PM

    RBeezy is right. Canadians (the Canadians I’ve experienced, at least) call them suet. Especially when packaged in those red nylon mesh bags. But 8 for $2? You’d better grab some before you head back!

  • Reply
    Christina Warren
    February 19, 2008 at 11:40 PM

    OK, see, this is where we are different, I hate Us Weekly (and I hated it before it was a ‘Weekly’ – it’s the chip in Jann Wenner magazine trifecta), but I’m a big fan of gossip rags. I don’t ever buy them or anything (as if, I have too many legitimate magazine subscriptions as it is), but I enjoy them nonetheless. And I love the British tabloids, because they are just SO outlandish. And it’s nuts too because their libel laws are so much more harsh than those in the US, yet they write shit that our tabloids are only now getting around to doing – and they’ve been at it for decades. Really though, I love how their culture views tabloids. It’s much more healthy, I think, than how America deals with it (not sure how Canada differs, or if it does, but you guys get exposure by proxy), because like everyone is in on the joke and the insanity of it all. And it explains why the UK has Graham Norton and America is stuck with Jay Leno.

    It’s funny that you turned off tabloids after Britney shaved her head; I called my sister immediately (one of our only common interests is ragging on Britney and worshiping Posh) – and we were both in various public places and proceeded to either amuse or annoy the people around us by having a 45 minute gab fest discussing the details and how she was such an attention whore for making sure to do it in front of the window and mirror. Like, I know the girl is all cracked out, but at least in the head shaving incident, she wanted the publicity. It’s kind of less cool to gawk now, but still – at least the kids are with the sane parent.

    I will admit the Anna-Nicole nonsense made me want to throw up. Especially because of that documentary that the gay guys who did The Eyes of Tammy Faye (World of Wonder, Fenton is one guy’s name — whatever) that came out a few years before she died – like, you could see the inbreeding in her family and kind of realized she never even remotely had a chance. That got truly abhorrent, but Britney and her bag of bullshit has remained fascinating (less so since the Dr. Phil incident, but he taints everything he touches) and entertaining, if only because I have been predicting her downfall for so many years (and won a bet with my ex because during the 2003 VMAs, I said her career would be over within 5 years, it only took 4; we made the bet because I was so incensed that they were pimping Britney as Madonna’s heir apparent, and come on, Madonna is God. Britney is a hick who got lucky and then got a good boob job).

    As for fat balls. Well. That’s just like the greatest picture/sign ever.

  • Reply
    Mark Wilkinson
    February 20, 2008 at 12:39 AM

    I have to agree with you on the pappo-trash (great word by the way :)). I am afraid that there is simply too much dross around in these rubbish mags today. I really could care less what Jordan had for her dinner or who drunk Paris Hilton was last night! That’s about as important as the stories get in most of them.

    As for your great picture of Fat Balls, they are bird food. My mum used too (maybe she still does actually) get all the old far from the chip pan (deep fryer) and then roll it in to balls with left over bread and stuff and put it out for the birds in the winter. They love it.

  • Reply
    Nick | PTO
    February 20, 2008 at 1:37 AM

    We get Wired too!

    We just have to travel about 300 miles to our neareset Borders book store, then pay a ridiculously inflated import price for it by remortgaging the Macs that already cost the Earth. But it’s worth it! I wouldn’t be without my Wired…

  • Reply
    February 20, 2008 at 1:57 AM

    For the «pappo-trash» it’s not specificly British, in all over the world it’s the same thing. The French like this kind of press too.
    It’s not so complicate to read because it’s stupid and mostly there is no bad news.
    For the fat balls any idea, but the British food is not the best in the world.

  • Reply
    February 20, 2008 at 2:29 AM

    Lisa you’re my hero! Celeb/Tabloid/Pappo-trash is a plague! I can’t stand the damn stuff and it’s everywhere. But it has it’s uses… It feeds the intellectual black hole and stops it consuming us smart people. :)

    oh yeah, Fat Balls ftw! :D


  • Reply
    February 20, 2008 at 4:13 AM

    There are some fat balls hanging off my tree outside!

  • Reply
    xen ix
    February 21, 2008 at 4:06 AM

    These trash-mags are not only typical British. You will find them all over Norway and Sweden, or any other European country I guess.

    Just ignore them. The UK has a lot more to offer you than this rubbish.

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    February 23, 2008 at 7:26 AM

    @Nate — mmm, balls.

    @RBeezy — how bout nutz n’ balls?

    @Chris — yeah, you try explaining a suitcase full of fat balls to customs.

    @Christina — it’s always hard, finding the first different personality trait in a relationship, but i must stay anti-tabloid, for the good of my health. it’s not that i’m not tempted, but when productivity means money, i cannot justify taking time to check the tabloids. plus, with so much celeb happenings in mainstream media, it’s hard to not know what’s going on.

    i will admit to having a britney bet. a much more malicious bet than the one you had. i had to cancel it, as it was weighing heavily on my angel pure soul. i will also admit to watching the Anna Nicole series on DVD once when i was desperately sick. it made me feel better about my running nose and aches and pains. so for that Anna, i thank you.

    @Mark — indeed. i follow enough techno-trash rumor mill to get my fill of useless information. thanks for the fat ball home recipe. i’ll try it out and see if Canadian birds dig the fat balls as much as the British ones.

    @Nick — i searched high and low and not one Wired did I find. i did, however, see several magazines advertising gigantic boobs.

    @Denis — true enough. can’t seem to escape it really, can you?

    @Dan — i’m totally coining that phrase, Fat Balls, FTW! It has really has so many meanings, one could apply it to any situation.

    @Max — hi-5!

    @xen ix — don’t worry, i was able to see loads of the countryside, many old things, and a few football matches.

  • Reply
    Chris Magnusson
    February 23, 2008 at 1:33 PM

    @Lisa: you couldn’t declare them as gifts? After all, you wouldn’t be consuming them yourself. (I hope.)

  • Reply
    February 26, 2008 at 1:40 PM

    “Pappo-trash”. Awesome word. I think this one will come in useful! I don’t know why, but I’m thinking “Pappo-trash” stickers, in order to educate the uneducated?!

  • Reply
    Roland Hulme
    February 29, 2008 at 11:06 AM

    Oh come on! You guys love your tabloids too! I was reading all about Britney Spears at a checkout just last night.

    But at least you don’t have The Sun. Tabloid pretending to be news!!

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