Opinion

No pants to get in the way of Madonna’s superstardom

On the eve of Madonna’s very first appearance in Vancouver, I sit here, wrapped up in a snuggly blanket, wondering how Madge is braving the wet and nippy West Coast weather without pants.

If there’s any ever-present, consistent force in the spectacular, often jaw-dropping 25-year career of the Queen of Pop, it’s the lack of pants.

For Madonna, laced under-things and nude fishnets trump all pants. I’d be genuinely shocked if there was a 3 to 1 ratio of leotards to pants in Madonna’s wardrobe. And hey, who can blame her, the woman could give Olympic gymnastic gold medalist, Nastia Liukin, a run for her money in Spandex’s “World’s Tightest Limbs Competition”.

If you’ve got it flaunt it. And that’s just what she’s done. For better or worse, Madonna has stayed in the harsh glow that is super stardom for over a quarter-century. And she’s done it without ever shaving her head, entering rehab, or attacking anyone with an umbrella. And that’s saying something since she’s lived in Soggy Ol’ Britain for 8 years.

I’ll skip the recent details of her personal life because as you know from my previous Perez Hilton bashing article, I’m not a fan of celebrity gossip. But in this case, I’ll allow one cheesy phrase and say that no ‘pants’ will ever get in the way of Madonna’s superstardom.

I am on pins-and-needles to see what kind of hip-thrusts and alternative disco/pilates moves Madonna pulls out at her sold out show at BC Place Stadium tomorrow night. To be sure, they will be both “Sticky & Sweet”!
I want to hear about what you think of the Queen of Pop
What’s your favourite or least favourite Madonna song, video, movie (*cough*), performance, fashion, publicity stunt, dance move, British saying?

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  • James Walker
    October 30, 2008 at 2:16 AM

    My favorite British saying….”Eee by gum, that were reet grand”

    Yorkshire for “That was very nice”

  • Stefan
    October 30, 2008 at 2:42 AM

    To me she is just to fake. SHE IS 50!

  • Leggyblonde
    October 30, 2008 at 2:58 AM

    Song: “Like a Prayer”
    Movie: A League of Their Own

  • Eric Hamilton
    October 30, 2008 at 3:30 AM

    My favorite Madonna moments are actually remixes. Ben Crea’s fabulous “Time Goes By” (free MP3 link) featuring Madonna vocals from “Hung Up”, and the Pet Shop Boy’s awesome electro remix of “Sorry” (YouTube link).

    Madonna is still kicking ass.

  • Miiitch
    October 30, 2008 at 7:45 AM

    (Timbaland:)
    I’m outta time and all I got is 4 minutes(x8)
    Come on
    Yeah
    Break down
    Come on

    (Madonna:)
    Come on boy
    I’ve been waiting for somebody
    To pick up my stroll

    (Justin:)
    Well don’t waste time
    Give me a sign
    Tell me how you wanna roll

    (Madonna:)
    I want somebody to speed it up for me
    Then take it down slow
    There’s enough room for both

    (Justin:)
    Well, I can handle that
    You just gotta show me where it’s at
    Are you ready to go
    (Are you ready to go)

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    If you want it
    You already got it
    If you thought it
    It better be what you want
    If you feel it
    It must be real just
    say the word
    and ima give you what you want

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    Time is waiting
    We only got 4 minutes to save the world
    No hesitating
    Grab a boy
    Grab a girl
    Time is waiting
    We only got 4 minutes to save the world
    No hesitating
    We only got 4 minutes, 4 minutes

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    Keep it up, keep it up, don’t be a pri, hey
    Madonna, uh
    You gotta get `em all hop
    Tick tock tick tock tick tock
    That’s right, keep it up, keep it up, don’t be a pri, hey
    Madonna, uh
    You gotta get `em all hop
    Tick tock tick tock tick tock

    (Madonna:)
    Sometimes I think what I need is a you intervention, yeah

    (Justin:)
    And you know I can tell that you like it
    And that it’s good, by the way that you move, ooh, hey

    (Madonna:)
    The road to hell is paved with good intentions, yeah

    (Justin:)
    But if I die tonight
    At least I can say I did what I wanted to do
    Tell me, how bout you?

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    If you want it
    you already got it
    If you thought it
    It better be what you want
    If you feel it
    It must be real just
    Say the word and im a give you what you want

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    Time is waiting
    We only got 4 minutes to save the world
    No hesitating
    Grab a boy
    Grab a girl
    Time is waiting
    We only got 4 minutes to save the world
    No hesitating
    We only got 4 minutes, 4 minutes

    (Madonna & Justin:)
    Keep it up, keep it up, don’t be a pri, hey
    Madonna, uh
    You gotta get `em all hop
    Tick tock tick tock tick tock
    That’s right, keep it up, keep it up, don’t be a pri, hey
    Madonna, uh
    You gotta get `em all hop
    Tick tock tick tock tick tock

    (Timbaland:)
    Breakdown
    Yeah
    (tick tock tick tock tick tock)
    Yeah, uh huh
    (tick tock tick tock tick tock)
    I only got 4, minutes to save the world

  • Sam Barber
    October 30, 2008 at 8:00 AM

    I just attended Madonna’s concert here in Chicago on Sunday. I was dragged by my partner and wouldn’t call myself a Madonna fan, but there is no question that she puts on a hell of a show. This tour is definitely more of a greatest hits collection, which is a good thing. When she launched into “Like A Prayer”, the United Center almost erupted.

    She may not be one of the best singers, but she’s definitely a top performer.

  • Lacy
    October 30, 2008 at 8:35 AM

    My most favorite thing Madonna ever is in the movie “A League of Their Own” when Madonna is teaching the woman who doesn’t know how to read..how to read. And it’s a dirty book and they’re talking about milky white breasts. It seriously always cracks me up.

  • Steve
    October 30, 2008 at 9:22 AM

    She must do Pilates about 24 hours a day! Actually, I was really impressed by her “Confessions on a Dance Floor” album, but I admittedly love dance/club music, and the production value was excellent!

    As for movies, I remember really enjoying “Desperately Seeking Susan” when I was younger. LOL

  • Celeron
    October 30, 2008 at 9:51 AM

    You say you are no fan of celebrity gossip, but I see you blogging about them more often than before. What’s up with that, Lisa? I already think you’re hotter (and smarter) than all of them popular people, and I’m sure everyone here thinks the same, so start posting less of them and more of your beautiful self.

    Cheers

  • ares
    October 30, 2008 at 11:32 AM

    lol.good one lisa. never noticed it till now that most of the time maddona’s pants are missing. but she is 50 now and its time for her to fill her wardrobe with pants, becoz she is going to need them real soon.

  • Todd
    October 30, 2008 at 12:20 PM

    Was never a fan of Madonna. Still not really a fan, more a fan of her nanny, an Australian (like myself) who has converted Madonna’s adopted son, David Banda, into a fan of my favourite football team. Seems the kid loves his Hawthorn jumper and wears it everywhere.

    Madonna is now seen in a different light in my eyes.

    http://news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,,24555219-663,00.html

  • Tim O
    October 30, 2008 at 6:13 PM

    I was cheerfully present at the Openingnight concert in Montreal, and WOW — what a show!!! It’s the third Madonna concert my wife and I have attended, and WOW — best one yet!!!!

    Just please, if you can — see if the stage grips are playing poker on the very front stage left — it was peculiar — but interesting just the same.
    Love to Madge,
    T

  • Tim
    October 30, 2008 at 10:50 PM

    The video – Justify My Love – on my iPod and watched regularly — pretty steamy, oldie but a goodie!!

  • JeffDM
    October 31, 2008 at 1:19 AM

    I know you said she can’t sing, though I wonder if that’s an attempt to manufacture controversy. I don’t think anyone can dispute that Madonna is a master of creating controversy. As such, I’m not a fan of Madonna, but the “Something to Remember” album is pretty good.

  • Andrew
    October 31, 2008 at 12:32 PM

    Can’t stand her and she needs to retire.

  • Hannah Solo
    November 7, 2008 at 3:19 AM

    Untalented, overrated and overvalued. She needs to go away. Madonna, please, just go away.