Buying electronics should be a pleasurable experience, but somehow it never is. The stores are built like labrynths with things in the most unlikely, illogical places ever. You’re always searching and waiting and listening to somebody crank annoying music to test out a hot sub or a super crappy iPod speaker set. There’s always someone who spoils the fun of your first moments with your new gear.
Now granted, I’m not your average electronics purchaser. I know my shizz. I go into a store knowing exactly what I want. And I want to get it in less than 30 seconds. I don’t want to discuss the features, or talk about extra warrantees, or hang out in the Mac section opening and closing iLife apps waiting for somebody to notice how cool I am. I just wanna get my gear and get it home and turn it on and realize I’ve bought the wrong batteries.
I get so frustrated in electronic stores that I have to actively fantasize about an alternate reality where annoying people are suddenly taken out by mythical demons and large beasts of the underworld…
Me: Do you know where I can find external HDs?
Dude: Uh… that’s not my department. [turns to guy next to him] uhhh, Dan do you know where the HDs are?
Dan: Uhhh… [looks at me] You should really get blue ray.
Suddenly, a crazy-eyed Spartan with a glistening sword leaps out from behind the USB cables. FOR SPARTA!!!!!!!!
Me: I’d like to get the Canon G9.
Pale, skinny dude with spiky peroxide hair and slight lisp: Oh yeah. Super great deal. Great choice. Yeah, I’ll just go get one from the back for you.
[16.5 minutes pass. I see skinny dude yakking to his buddies in the Xbox section. Steam literally starts to come out of my ears. Camera dude finally notices me standing in front of me.]
Dude: Can I help you?
Just then a gigantic tarantula burrows out of the earth. ATTACK!!!
mid-20s over primped girl with Gucci purse & high heels looking at MB Air: Do these Macs come with Facebook?
Just then a snaggle-toothed T-Rex leaps out from behind the Mac Pro… CHOMP!!!