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Ack! There’s a PC in my living room.

Ack there's an evil PC in my living room

 

Quick! Mac Attack! Alert the Airport Extreme and launch the iPod fighter jets!

I’ll admit it. I once owned a PC. It was a dark period in my computing past, complete with a CD drive that wouldn’t work and a system infected with the Trojan horse virus… Seriously? I thought that was a myth? It’s not. And this big meanie, circa 1999, has got it. Bad.

So, why is it here? Well, my mum who has been storing this beast in the basement for the last 9 years, was about to junk it and not wanting the Paps to find any indecent snaps, my im records from high school (ack!) or my crappy early teenage poetry, i wanted to make sure to wipe HD crystal clean…. before smashing at least part of it. Wiiii smashing a PC. Oh come on, you’ve never wanted to smash a PC?? Never ever???

And how to my Macs think about this new “guest” in their zone? Nothing pleasant. In fact, they are planning a full fledged stealth attack at day break tomorrow to catch the PC Meanie off-guard and hopefully take out his power source and memory.

If I’m able to get up early enough, I may capture the mac attack on video. I can feel your excitement building. I can feeeeeeel it!

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30 Comments

  • Reply
    Joey
    March 19, 2008 at 2:06 AM

    Quick! Kill it before it infects your Macs! :-)

  • Reply
    Sylvain the Frenchy
    March 19, 2008 at 2:16 AM

    An infected PC ? Just install Ubuntu on it, it will change your life and you will have as good 3D effects as on Mac OS (and it’s free!) ;)

  • Reply
    tyfn
    March 19, 2008 at 2:35 AM

    PC looks nervous.

  • Reply
    Keiron
    March 19, 2008 at 4:36 AM

    You could auction off ways of destroying it on eBay, highest bidder gets to choose the first method of destruction etc. Could run to an entertaining video series!!!

    Episode 1 – Match heads in the floppy drive sponsored by M$.
    Episode 2 – The power of a lump hammer by sponsored by Bob’s Hardware.

    The possibilities are endless ;-)

  • Reply
    Will
    March 19, 2008 at 7:17 AM

    I recommend a ten pound sledge hammer. A five would probably be enough but I say better safe than sorry. Also dynamite is good.

  • Reply
    Dan
    March 19, 2008 at 8:11 AM

    Come on Lisa, that’s unfairly harsh. I’m a PC man and I maintain that if you look after your PC, it will look after you. I’m not saying Macs are without their uses. From a video/audio/photo editing point of view, the point and shoot simplicity of a mac along with the eye candy makes it the right tool for the job.

    However, the lack of a right click would drive me utterly insane. I can’t imagine trying to use fireworks or photoshop without a right click, or browse the net without a middle click.

    There’s also the price aspect to consider. Get yourself a high end macbook pro, you’re looking about Β£1600 – Β£1800. For the same money you could get a much higher spec windows laptop. The ultimate example of Apple’s penchant for style over content is the macbook air. I agree it’s a very sexy little number but it’s nothing more than a gimick because the extremely low spec makes it only good enough for basic computing, browsing, email etc…. Β£1200? I think not! I can do all that on my phone.

    And on the subject of Viruses, As long as your AV software is up to dae and you take care in what you’re browsing you have next to nothing to worry about. Viruses exist for mac too, despite popular belief.

    I will give credit where credit is due, because OSX is loosley based on UNIX it’s stability is excellent.

    For me, Windows is perfect; not so simplified as OSX and not as laborious as Linux.

  • Reply
    August
    March 19, 2008 at 8:48 AM

    Oh, crap! My iPod, that just launched itself from its dock, is flying over the Atlantic to participate in that stealth attack…

  • Reply
    Nate
    March 19, 2008 at 9:16 AM

    OMG 3.5″ floppy!!!

  • Reply
    Joey
    March 19, 2008 at 9:33 AM

    @Dan-FYI: right click has been available in OSX for several years now.

  • Reply
    Dan
    March 19, 2008 at 9:49 AM

    @Joey

    but it’s not on the standard mice and doesn’t come on macbook touchpads. You’re forced to use an external mouse if you want it.

  • Reply
    Mitchell
    March 19, 2008 at 9:53 AM

    There’s a PC down the hall from my room. It’s connected to the printer. The printer does not like Macs, so I’m forced to use the PC in order to print anything. And then I go to do a few shortcuts and screw everything up, because I hit a different button than control. Command. Whatever.

    I take advantage of every opportunity I get to explain to my parents how getting a Mac has bettered my life. And every time they complain about the PC being slow/getting viruses/freezing/restarting/blue screen of death-ing/other random PC stuff, I simply say “It wouldn’t do that if it wasn’t a PC.”

    And now they’ve decided that the next computer they buy will be a Mac. But they want the 24″, just to one-up me. ARGH.

    @DAN: Control-click FTW. Or, right click. You can set it up how you like.

    And by the way, it’s Herbal Essence’s Hello Hydration. Yep.

  • Reply
    Dan
    March 19, 2008 at 9:57 AM

    Control+Click has always seemed ridiculous to me. Why have a two handed combination for somethign that windows has managed with a single mouse click for so long. It’s an accessibility nightmare.

    Right click is accessible at no detriment to an able bodied user.

  • Reply
    michael wilson
    March 19, 2008 at 10:18 AM

    Hi guys
    At the moment i have a pc but 1 years ago a had a fully working mac laptop. I miss it so bad. Never had a desktop mac. If anyone would like to buy me one please feel free to do so. But i hated ipods because it keep freezing on me all the time. So i in both camps at the moment.

    P.s i’m also a stumbleupon addict so my opinion should not be take into account.

  • Reply
    Christina Warren
    March 19, 2008 at 10:43 AM

    I was a bi-partisan user for many, many years, and actually – the PC was my main platform at home until last summer – when I finally went Mc full time.

    I have actually recorded myself smashing a PC (and two priners) down the stairs of my apartment complex. Fun stuff – very Office Space.

    I think the Macs will be OK. Just keep them away from that latch on that Compaq case (former PC repair girl here), they’re a bitch to open (the 1999 series anyway, the later 2001 series that looked the same were easier, still a bitch to get the front panel off though).

  • Reply
    Chris Magnusson
    March 19, 2008 at 11:39 AM

    To be fair, the end-user experience depends an awful lot on the manufacturer and model. I’ve owned four PCs in my lifetime and they are as follows:

    PC 1 – simply awesome

    PC 2 – sucktastic

    PC 3 – Who the eff unleashed this unholy demon from the gates of hell upon society?!?

    PC 4 – smooth like buttah. In fact, I pre-ordered it with Vista installed several days before Vista was released, and I’ve never had such a pleasant computing experience in my life.

    That said, I’m considering a Mac (likely a Macbook simply because I like their size) for my next computer.

  • Reply
    Mark
    March 19, 2008 at 12:54 PM

    Well I am also a mac person but I have to admit that recently I have bought a new pc. Although I love my Mac and will still continue to use it for 90% of the time, there are some things and software that I need a PC for. Also we use them at work at sometimes it is just easier that having to use the mac all the time.

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    March 19, 2008 at 7:11 PM

    oooooooooohhhh iiiiiiiii. this post stirred up some emotions!!! nothing like the eternal MAC Vs. PC debate to get the blood pumping.remember that I got kicked outta computer camp at age 8 for refusing to use a PC.

    i’ll hit y’all back after i’ve finished a wee bit o’ work.

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    March 21, 2008 at 1:24 AM

    @Pasquale — you bet! just don’t put it on my lap.

    @Joey — I’ve left it by the fire. i figure it will slowly melt the virus outta it.

    @Sylvain the Frenchy — thanks for the tip, though somehow i feel your advice will be lost on this ancient beast.

    @tyfn — sure does!

    @Keiron — good plan. @Will -i’m on it. Home Depot here i come.

    @Dan — oh maaan. giving me a talking to. and it seems as though the right click issue has stirred up some shizz. the thing is, Mac’s are awesome and for me there is no alternative, and the Mac Pro is a pricey computer, but the Macbook is super affordable and totally rammed with all the goodness you need to do above and beyond “Point and Shoot” things, including editing in HD on Final Cut Pro. But, I understand for a lot of people it just doesn’t crumble their cookie.. uh.. that sounded weird and made me kinda hungry… so don’t get your nickers in a knot. you know that my sass is all in good fun and that i make fun of mac failage as much as PC’s lameage.

    And re: right click… just like every short cut on a mac you just learn it and then it becomes muscle memory and ziing you’re all over your finder like speedy gonzales.

    @Nate — i’m gonna fire up some pretty sweet floppies asap.

    @Mitch — buy a brand new Canon Pixma iP4500 or a derivation of that. Canon loves macs, so you’ll have no probs. i print wirelessly through my airport extreme. it’s pretty awesome. lemme know if i can help you get sorted.

    @Michael Wilson — what kind of pills do stumbleupon addicts take?

    @Christina Warren — you must show me that PC smashing video sounds super awesome. also i could use your expertise in dismantling the evil PC.

    @Chris Magnusson — heart warming. you should spread your word throughout the world, “I love my PC and I don’t care what you mac users say!!!

    @Mark — what software won’t run on a Mac?

  • Reply
    Mark
    March 21, 2008 at 1:45 AM

    I use PQ DVD in order to convert dvds to iPod – its really easy and I haven’t found anything better. It is only Windows. And Camtasia Studio for screen recordings – also Windows only. I have bootcamped but it is a pain having to restart all the time.

  • Reply
    Chris Magnusson
    March 21, 2008 at 8:24 AM

    @Mostly Lisa — In reply to your request to Christina Warren: get a largish Phillips head screwdriver and remove every single screw in the machine. Then remove anything that was held in place by a screw. Et violΓ , the machine has been dismantled! Unless the machine is a compaq/hp, in which case you’ll need a torx screwdriver. But I forget which size torx you’ll need as it’s been a very long time since I’ve worked on either an hp or a compaq.

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    March 21, 2008 at 8:07 PM

    @Mark — take a look at Visual Hub. It’s what I use to convert all my video files. it’s uber.

    @Chris Magnusson — it is a Compaq. lame. I has no Torx. But I kinda want one. If only to say “I can has Torx”.

  • Reply
    Duane Storey
    March 22, 2008 at 1:33 AM

    I actually just went out and bought a new quad core PC for some server stuff I’m playing with. Never thought I’d get one of those again. But truth is Macs just aren’t good servers.

  • Reply
    Dan
    March 25, 2008 at 7:08 AM

    Haha, I wasn’t telling you off… Just expressing my opinion.

    My biggest issue with the lack of right mouse buttons on standard kit is that Apple seem to have made the choice to do context menus with control+click a long while back and despite it having glaring accessibility issues, they seem to have said “Nope it’s our decision and we’re sticking with it even if it was kinda wrong.”

    but hey ho… I don’t use a mac and don’t plan to in the forseeable future.

    It takes different strokes to move the world.. :)

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    March 25, 2008 at 10:38 PM

    @Dan — i agree it is a bit silly, but after a while you get used to ctrl + clicking that you don’t even notice, but at first it’s basically the most annoying thing ever.

    *shakes your hand and makes peace*

  • Reply
    Dan
    March 26, 2008 at 12:45 AM

    :D

  • Reply
    Ian
    March 26, 2008 at 2:59 PM

    Just Dban (Darik’s Boot and Nuke it)… then put it out at the recycling depot)

  • Reply
    funkoolow
    March 27, 2008 at 11:49 PM

    instead of crushing it, isn’t there a LUG nearby who promotes trashware initiatives?

  • Reply
    Mostly Lisa
    March 29, 2008 at 1:50 AM

    @Dan — :razz:

    @Ian — good point.

    @funkoolow — I’ll check, if there is anyway that i can donate this beast to a charity or someone that could still make use of it. but if it’s beyond repair, i’ll do my best to find some one who will recycle it.

  • Reply
    Chris Magnusson
    March 29, 2008 at 12:50 PM

    There was something a while back on iirc Miss604’s blog about a group that went around collecting used hardware with the intention of recycling it. I can’t find anything about it now, but there are organizations that do that kind of stuff. Worst case scenario if you want to go that route is that you have to pack the beast to a central pickup location where it’ll be carted wherever, dismantled, and recycled.

  • Reply
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