Life Photography Travel

A Story about Chichen Itza

lisabettanychichen

Chichen Itza, Mayan Riviera

I finally got round to flickring my photos of Chichen Itza, the “large pre-Columbian archaeological site built by the Maya civilization located in the northern center of the Yucatán Peninsula, in the Yucatán state, present-day Mexico” says Wikipedia. Now, I’ll look it up in my $150 university art history book to make sure that’s right (the very same one that I took for light reading on my first trip to England to seem “cultured”.)

Oh wow. I’m actually reading a book. It feels weird and unnatural. I can’t scroll. Ack! I have to turn these big heavy pages. Ug. So apparently Chichen Itza means “at the mouth of the well of the Itza”, and has nothing to do with the Leaning Tower of Pisa, but rhymes nicely with pizza. Hmm… there are only 3 paragraphs about Chichen Itza in this 1167 page book! What a jerk! I guess we will just have to rely on the web as our guide to this weird and wacky Mayan world.

The massive and awe-inspiring Mesoamerican pyramid in the middle of the site is called el Castillo or the Temple of Kukulkan.

Temple of Kukulcán (El Castillo), Chichen Itza, Mexico

El Castillo was built by the Maya Civilization somewhere between 11th and 13th century AD when *the Decepticons first came to earth.

Razor beak! ha!

The massive structure is guarded by these crazy man-eating alligators. Well, actually they are supposed to be serpents, but I called them alligators on flickr, then felt sheepish, so I changed the title to “Mean Slytherin Dudes”. PS. I also spelled serpent, ‘serpant’. Sir Pant! So regal.

Mean Slytherin dudes, Chichen Itza

Right after the Decepticons came to earth and built the pyramids, an *alien race of evil cats called “los Gatos Malignos” ruled the Mayan empire with an iron fish! I mean fist!

Evil Cats and Pyramids

According to *archeologists, Mayan youths were quite rambunctious and would let off steam before the “virgin sacrifices” by drawing rude graffiti on the temple walls.

Evil Panther Wall, Temple of the Panthar. RRR.

While visiting this new Wonder of the World, I felt moved to perform a feat of agility.

As a result of performing this feat of agility, I was 8 minutes late for the bus back to the hotel, which angered and greatly annoyed my ever punctual mother. She wouldn’t even speak to me for like half an hour.

My mum, Chichen Itza, Mayan Riviera

To make matters worse, I climbed this pyramid model at the hotel and made Gozilla noises for an embarrassingly long length of time. She was not amused, but I felt that this was an important step in my self-growth as an adult.

Conquered!

If you want more Mostly Lisa fun, check out my video of my Chichen Itza adventure.

*details may have been exaggerated or completely made up for the purposes of sarcasm and/or humour.

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14 Comments

  • Reply
    Tom
    May 31, 2008 at 10:49 PM

    Doesn’t your mum read this? Howdy, Ms Bettany!

  • Reply
    djh
    May 31, 2008 at 11:04 PM

    Your Mum is gorgeous! But isn’t Chicken Itsey is a bit of an unusual name? Is it foreign or summat? Or is it just your super-secret private name for her, like Mumsie or Marm?

  • Reply
    Luc
    May 31, 2008 at 11:31 PM

    What’s the big surprise that you’re reading a book? After all, you’re not a blonde, are you?
    :)

  • Reply
    Ryan Ray
    May 31, 2008 at 11:39 PM

    Is Gozilla a new, city destroying creauture?

  • Reply
    Ryan Ray
    May 31, 2008 at 11:58 PM

    Remind me how to spell creature as well

  • Reply
    Tyler Ingram
    June 1, 2008 at 7:28 AM

    Pretty cool place. I’ve always wanted to see the Mayan temples etc ever since I started learning about them in grade 6. Glad to see laserbeak out spying on the humans for the Decepticons.

  • Reply
    Jack F
    June 1, 2008 at 12:26 PM

    You have no idea how jealous I am!

  • Reply
    Brett Legree
    June 1, 2008 at 3:53 PM

    Thanks for the photos and the story – I soooo want to go and see this for myself.

    I’ll watch out for the Decepticons… :)

    -Brett

  • Reply
    Chris
    June 1, 2008 at 7:23 PM

    Ooh! Did you get to hablar español? Did anybody swear at you en español?

  • Reply
    John Hood
    June 2, 2008 at 5:36 AM

    I spy Lazerbeak! :-)

  • Reply
    Mr. Diggles
    June 2, 2008 at 9:53 AM

    There are theories that suggest the temples were built by the Nephilim. Which were a race of super humans that were up to 36 feet tall. The lizards are a whole other bag of worms. Decepitcons is not too far off.

    Remember – no means no.

  • Reply
    Mitchell
    June 2, 2008 at 10:25 AM

    “I climbed this pyramid model at the hotel and made Gozilla noises for an embarrassingly long length of time. She was not amused, but I felt that this was an important step in my self-growth as an adult.”

    Don’t you know that making Gozilla noises as a developing adult lead to an increased chance of hepatitis B, A, C, J, and K? To avoid these problems, stick with Elephant and Gorillz noises.

  • Reply
    Ducho
    June 6, 2008 at 2:23 PM

    dont you found some vestigiuos of decepticons culture ??

  • Reply
    Yorkshire Escort
    February 1, 2010 at 6:56 PM

    Im going to ad this to my twitter.

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